You’ve probably read about the studies showing that teenagers who sit down with their parents to eat dinner on a regular basis have better grades and are less likely to have problems with drugs and alcohol. Well, I don’t know about that, but I do think there is something special that happens when families gather around the table for a meal together. Especially when visitors are asked to join them – whether they be relatives, friends or new acquaintances. At a time when so many of us eat our meals on the go – stopping quickly at drive-thrus or eating in front of the TV, gathering around the table with loved ones is a ritual that I hope we can hold on to.
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Thanksgiving table at my parents' house, Nov. 2010 |
You’ve probably read about the studies showing that teenagers who sit down with their parents to eat dinner on a regular basis have better grades and are less likely to have problems with drugs and alcohol. Well, I don’t know about that, but I do think there is something special that happens when families gather around the table for a meal together. Especially when visitors are asked to join them – whether they be relatives, friends or new acquaintances. At a time when so many of us eat our meals on the go – stopping quickly at drive-thrus or eating in front of the TV, gathering around the table with loved ones is a ritual that I hope we can hold on to.
I can remember many meals growing up when my parents invited others to join us. Sometimes they made a special effort to include a man whose wife had recently passed away, or a couple who was new to town and needed to feel welcomed. Mom had her usual good dishes – either beef stroganoff or chicken with wild rice –and I always looked forward to a special dessert at the end! My parents were gracious hosts. There was something special that happened when the white tablecloth came out and the silver was polished.
Of course, the ordinary meals are just as important when families sit down to share the events of the day with each other, and, hopefully, have a good laugh or two (and once in a while, a good quarrel). For my husband and me, this has been an important time to be with our nine-year-old daughter, as we listen to her opinions and ideas about life, and hopefully teach her by example how to carry on a conversation where everyone is included and heard. We also enjoy inviting others to join us, though we don’t do it nearly as frequently as my folks did. But when it seems easier to take our company out for a quick bite, I try my best to make sure that we have at least one meal at our table with them, as if to say – welcome to our home, our family, and our food – it means a lot to have you here.
For life is what you make it. So make it good!
For more on this topic, I recommend these books:
The Surprising Power of Family Meals by Miriam Weinstein
Come to the Table: A Celebration of Family Life by Doris Christopher
Ann, you are doing a great job of following in your parent's footsteps, as I have been on the receiving end of your gracious hospitality.
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