New Beginnings

My daughter's school supplies neatly laid out on our table.

This week marks the beginning of a new school year – which around our house means my daughter starts fourth grade and I get back to teaching.  As for my husband, well, he continues to plug away in his cubicle at work, as always.  It’s been a fun summer, and I’m a bit winsome about it coming to an end – except for the heat!  But as my girl counts out her new pencils and other school supplies on our dining room table, and I start to get a peek inside the new textbook I will be using, I start turning my attention to the fall and the year ahead.

          Even if your life doesn’t revolve around the school calendar, what new beginnings are in store for you?  I’m not good at transitioning from one period of life to another (getting back home after vacations is always a welcome relief, but it takes awhile for me to feel comfortable in my old routine), but it’s important to be pulled into new adventures.  As I think about this coming year, I’m optimistic about the new experiences it can offer.
         Are you happy?  Are there ways that you can make yourself happier?  A strange segue I know, but I’m thinking about a book I read this summer and want to share some of its ideas with you.  It’s called The Happiness Project: Or Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun by Gretchen Rubin.  Now, I’m not one for self-help books – personally I think they’re pretty shallow, but this one intrigued me, and I wasn’t disappointed.  This author said she already felt she was reasonably happy in her life, but wondered if she could improve her situation by making specific resolutions each month (for instance, she found that by just getting to bed thirty minutes earlier each night, she felt much better and things went more smoothly the next day -- my goal would be to get up a bit earlier each morning).

            Anyway, here are a few of her thoughts:

• What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while.
• Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.
• “Happiness,” wrote Yeats, “is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that, but simply growth.  We are happy when we are growing.”
• You can’t change anyone but yourself.
• Work can be a source of many of the elements for a happy life: the atmosphere of growth, social contact, fun, a sense of purpose, self-esteem, recognition.
• Denying bad feelings intensifies them; acknowledging bad feelings allows good feelings to return.
• It’s important to keep happy memories vivid in your mind, so you can recall them when you’re discouraged.
• New experiences are an important source of happiness.
• Having strong social bonds is probably the most meaningful contributor to happiness.
• Don’t gossip.
• If you can find the time, making a new friend is extremely energizing. New friends expand your world by providing an entrance to new interests, and opportunities. And, you can play the same role for them.
• Actively invite others to join a conversation.
• Stop the venting and complaining.
• Give thanks: for the ordinary and the extraordinary.
• Stop buying useless crap.
• Shit happens – count on it.
• Choose not to take things personally.
• Play the hand you're dealt.
• Your physical state is crucial: getting enough sleep, exercise, nutritious food, etc.
• Indulge in a modest splurge.
• Money can buy happiness if it is used wisely.
• For many, fear of what might happen is a source of great unhappiness—yet they feel there’s a propitiatory virtue in fretting. Stop worrying.
• Cut people slack.
• When listening to other people speak, listen intently.
• Don’t eat fake food.
• Direct your thoughts away from subjects that make you angry or irritable.

        Please excuse the abundance of ideas here – I tried to list things that were provocative and not too cliché.  Take what you want from this list – I find it worth pondering.  For now, have a good week, and a good new year!

For life is what you make it. So make it good!